Last night I walked next door to bum a pop....And it felt like someone was walking behind me. Honestly this has NEVER happened. I've always felt just fine walking out in the dark..well walking back it didn't feel like someone was behind me. It looked like someone was looking from behind my well box which is in the back yard. It was so dark I couldn't tell...and this morning I woke up and no one was home right? I walked into the kitchen, and the back door was wide open and it slammed shut......O_O I just kind of stood there..because no one was behind the door OR in front of it. Am I going crazy? I feel like someone's watching me, following me, but I don't know who......or WHAT.....I'm scared.. 

Screw that last entry...I don't have a dad anymore.

Oh great. Now that dad's quit drinking apparently he's going to find something else to pick up on. Mom caught him with a needle last night.   -Sigh-. Everything's so fucked up. I don't know what I'm going to do...


I think I may lay in bed all day and listen to depressing shit Idk..


=\

Today's been a waste...absolutely nothing good has happened. It's been frickin gloomy all day, the rain made me sleepy so I've slept most of the time today -Looks out window.- Damn, it's raining AGAIN! It did stop for a while, but it's started again. -_-
I'm staying up tonight..I wanna pull an all - nighter, I ain't in a while.   :D
I'm in a good mood pretty much other than this gloomy ass day XD

Yep...me and mom have been fighting again. She keeps threatening to leave. Unplug the cpu, blah blah BLAH. -_-
Honestly, she can leave.
Adios. Not stopping you. Hasta manana bitch. (Spanish for See you later.)
Misery is her hobby and she does well at making everyone feel that way. I really...really...hate this place..can someone just kill me? Already? It's better than this. And to make it even better..she thinks I'm taking pills..what the hell seriously...
Absolutely no one is on msn....I am bored/pissed..not giving a damn....I have been mad since I cussed out that old lady who came to my door being nosey. UGGGGHHH. I'm going to bed, fuck this.

I'm crying again....
Derrick just called....
Nick's okay.
:']
Thank you God..

My friend Nicholas got in a fourwheeling accident...Ilu Nick, you'll be okay.
It sucks...
Why does horrible shit always got to affect me?...
-.-...
Well I called the hospital...he checked out so apparently he's okay.
He was split from the end of his eye, to his hairline behind his temple, his eyelid looked like it had been almost ripped off...and he had roadburn all down his face...
And whoever the jackass is who flipped him ran off and left him...
From my knowledge Nick's brother's gonna beat that dude's ass..
Damn I've been crying all week, I thought he was fucking dead..and now I'm crying because he's okay.
If he would have gotten killed that wouldn't have been fair...I was just getting to know Nick...
but apparently I get to keep him :]..  =''''D
Life really is really short...I'm noticing you need to live it happy while you can.
But fuck it, he's okay that's all I care about!!

Lol weird title I know, but just telling you how my life has built up so far....er..how it's screwed itself up over the years...
-My mamaw on my mom's side died when I wasn't even 2 years old.
-My mamaw died on my dad's side when I was 11 followed my the death of my papaw on my mom's side not even a year later.
-My papaw, the only one I have left on my dad's side, has Alzheimer's and is in Hazard in a home...I may never see him again, unless I see him in his casket. He probably wouldn't remember me anyways, I haven't seen him in almost five years...
My dad use to drink about a year ago, he would come in throwing up, if not that...he was fighting with my mom. One night he was so bad off, that the next day, maybe the day after that, I had to talk to him myself. I pretty much made him decide, alcohol or your family. He made the right decision. I love you dad. 
     I don't know if I can say I've had the roughest life, but sometimes it sure feels like it. There are days I want to die, there are days that are more than worth living. There are days when I feel like nothing bring me down...and there are days when I feel like I'm cornered by the world and it's everyone against me. My mom and I don't get along the best, but there are days when we don't yell at each other at all...then there are those days when it feels like I'm on the frontline of the biggest war ever being fought.. Sometimes I wanna choke her, sometimes it feels like she doesn't even care about how I feel...but...I know deep down I love her. Dad, well I see him maybe a few hours every day because he works in fast food, a lot. That's how we live...he's thinking about coal mining. Most of the time I get along with dad, but damn when we do fight he gives me the guilt trip, and I hate that shit.
     My main reason for even thinking about signing up on an online journal...is because my parents are so nosey...I like to write about personal things which most of the time I don't hide so well, and they end up finding what I have wrote...and then bam, Makayla's grounded again...another thing is I feel like I can get more down just typing stuff because I like typing better than writing..my hand gets tired after a while then I start forgetting to write...which doesn't have to be everyday...then I stop writing period...
   Sometimes I feel like everyone is against me, I don't know why I feel that. But sometimes? No what I MEANT to write is almost all the time...